


Unrequited

by longkissgnite



Category: American Idiot - All Media Types, American Idiot - Green Day (Album), American Idiot - Green Day/Armstrong
Genre: If you’re here for stories relating to canon this is not it, M/M, My bastard oc Gregg Tequila Gordo Samantha Riot Harlow Falcon Cricket has a crush, Nothing much else to say besides it’s a crush fic, but if you would like to get to know my oc then this is it, dumb young crush, he’s in love with his straight best friend what do you want from him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:08:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24190339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/longkissgnite/pseuds/longkissgnite
Summary: An original character story about Cricket’s crush on Tunny, as well as his idea of love(and the love he is meant to receive).
Relationships: Original character/Tunny (one sided), mention of female original character/male original character, mention of male original character/male original character
Comments: 3
Kudos: 3





	Unrequited

⠀⠀He couldn’t pinpoint when he seemed to fall in love with his best friend; he could just tell you that somewhere along the line friendly kisses felt a lot more than friendly to Cricket. That sometime, when Tunny laughed and looked at him he could feel butterflies for the first time, and it wasn’t once, but every time. He couldn’t tell you when or how it happened, he just knew he loved Tunny more than he thought he could love anything else.  
⠀⠀When he was thirteen even, he could think of times just being around Tunny made him feel something that he hadn’t before. But then? At thirteen? He wouldn’t even consider it a crush. Tunny was his /best friend/, he just didn’t know anyone else like he knew Tunny. That’s all it is. He didn’t consider for a moment then that it was anything, but then again who’s thirteen and asking themselves if they’ve fallen in love?  
⠀⠀He knew though, when Olivia was around, that he was jealous sometimes. By how she could be close to him without any effort, even when they were younger and especially as they got older. But he was always jealous, it was a bit ridiculous; a rich kid who had the world was constantly envious of everyone around him. But it was a trait he had learned to accept and work with, like his selfishness or tendency to lie.  
⠀⠀He knew he loved Tunny, he knew that. But Cricket was in belief that anyone who really knew him should love Tunny. Sure, his friend was obnoxious and aggressive, but he cared /so much/ and if you knew him before his mother passed you were lucky. You got to see parts of Tunny that Cricket desperately missed each and every day. When Tunny was more open, almost more himself. Cricket wondered sometimes if maybe his best friend could love him back had his mother not died, if maybe he closed himself off so much that he stopped himself from being able to. He knew better, when he got older he did know better, this kind of shit wasn’t a choice, what asshole you loved wasn’t a choice. But sometimes, that selfish jealous part of him almost prayed it was. Was almost desperate that it would be a choice, just this once.  
⠀⠀Cricket knew what it was like to go unloved, but he had no idea what it was like to be loved. To really genuinely have someone love him as fully as he loved them. Danny didn’t, Olivia didn’t, and Tunny didn’t. It was okay, he just wasn’t the type of person people fall in love with, but he wished he was. He just wanted someone to look at him like he looked at them, or hold him with the exact same gentleness he had for them, or even… if he could ever be so lucky, to kiss him like they loved him. He would give anything to feel that love returned, even for a day, or an hour or even just a moment. He had everything to give, but all he gave up was himself and he still never got there. He still didn’t feel the undeniable spark returned.  
⠀⠀But he felt the spark most with Tunny, he felt it even doing normal things with Tunny. With Danny, he had to almost pretend, to /act/ like there was a spark still after things became serious. With Olivia, he should’ve known better, overall he should’ve, she’d /never/ love him. But with Tunny? It was easy. There was no acting or pretending, there was just being there with him, or even just thinking about him. Anything to do with Tunny had that spark attached. That undeniable feeling that he did in fact love him, and the hollowness that followed when he again realized it wasn’t returned.  
⠀⠀He didn’t blame Tunny, genuinely he didn’t. It frustrated him, because why Tunny? He didn’t know. But it wasn’t a choice, if it was a choice he would’ve loved Danny better, and maybe Danny would’ve chosen to love him too. If it was a choice then he wouldn’t have finally almost fallen for Olivia, just for her to not have done the same and hurt him. But with Tunny, it didn’t hurt necessarily. Tunny hurt him, but that’s who Tunny was. He was brash and aggressive, he sometimes did things without thinking, and sometimes it felt like without caring too. He hurt people, but loving him never hurt, just ached.  
⠀⠀He realized he was in love with Tunny a few times though, when their friend Maggie had pointed out he had an obvious crush. Cricket wasn’t one to blush, but she had elbowed him and raised her eyebrows, said “I know how you feel with that look,” it made him red all the way to his neck. He realized then, after all his friends had gone home for the day, sitting alone in his room, he had realized he loved Tunny.  
⠀⠀The second time was when he and Danny had broken up, it was a horrendous night, but Tunny had made it better and then some. He had gone to his house despite not talking in months. And Tunny was there, and Tunny was caring and gentle. Tunny sat with him and held him while he cried (something he desperately tried to never do around others). He had fallen asleep held by him then, despite being so scared to let anyone that close he wasn’t scared of him, he never was. It was easy to know he loved him when he treated him so gently, loving Tunny was /easy/.  
⠀⠀It never mattered how long they spent not talking, or how many fights they’ve had. At the end of the day, Cricket could look back and realize he loved him. His heart ached, he loved him /so much/ and he’d never know, let alone return it. It was something he came to accept, and that got easier to handle. It didn’t matter how much he loved Tunny and how little he was loved, there was always someone who would sleep with him, there was always someone to temporarily make him feel loved. Some people just weren’t meant to be loved, weren’t meant to have people love them. He was just one of them, that was all. Certainly he’d never meet anyone who loved him the same way he could love them, and he came to terms to be okay with that.

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t think I’ve said it nearly enough obviously, but Cricket is an original character of mine : D and of you’re curious about him and want to know more please I am begging you to dm me on Twitter (@one21gns) because talking about him is my favorite thing to do ever and always so never hesitate if you want to know more about him!


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